Christmas is a comin'

Every year without fail I always picture Christmas shopping as a joyous exercise, with cobbled streets, carol singers, chestnuts, and loveable street-urchins in equal measure. The reality is somewhat different: shuffling round an identi-kit shopping centre, sweating away in layers of wool while their heating blasts out at max usually accompanied by the musical stylings of Slade played at 100 decibels (do decibels even go up to 100? I've no idea, being completely inept at anything remotely technical to do with music, anyway this is beside the point). Now this year an ugly new trend has surfaced, while the shuffling and sweating remain unchanged there is a new breed of contemptable trash to slowly make your brain trickle out of your ear as you shop. For now almost every single store seems to believe that the way to make you part with your cash is to assault you with "songs that everybody loves" (TM H. Broadfoot 2003) as interpreted by Hollywood's favourite harridan. Not twigged yet? I speak of the Mama Mia soundtrack, featuring none other than Meryl "mummy what's wrong with that lady's face" Streep. The worst part? The fact that as you struggle to force your way to the till everyone around you is inanely mumbling the lyrics to Fernando with a dead look in their eyes to match the darkness of Streep's soul. Shudder.

In attept to dispel this blight that threatens to spoil the festive season I offer instead my Christmas playlist. Of course nothing beats a good traditional carol (with I Saw Three Ships and In The Bleak Midwinter vying for supremacy in my head) but I've here stuck to tracks by artists who would mostly be summed up as Alternative (no Jackson 5 or Aled Jones here) and tried to make sure that they all have a decent link to Christmas (although some are more tenuous than others) so without further rambling from me, I present to you Liger's Christmas Playlist 2008! -

1) Sufjan Stevans - Hey Guys! It's Christmas Time!
You have to applaud a man who has devoted a whole album to Christmas songs, he'll be popping up again in this list.
2) Eels - Everything's Gonna Be Cool This Christmas
Mr E rocks out, festive style.
3) The Go! Team - The Ice Storm
If snow was musical this is what it would sound like.
4) Bessie Smith - At The Christmas Ball
The Queen of Jazz's ode to Christmas piss-ups. Knowing her reputation I bet her Christmas parties were awesome. Prohibition-bisexual-sassy awesome. That's a very specific kind of awesome.
6) Low - Just Like Christmas
An absolutely lovely song from their Christmas E.P. (although the rest of the songs are a bit of a letdown).
7) The BBC National Orchestra of Wales - The Stowaway
The one concession to geekery on this list, this melancholy festive tune featured in last year's Doctor Who Christmas special. Thankfully the producers resisted the temptation to get Kylie to sing it.
8) No Doubt - Oi! To The World
Vandals cover, from the days before Gwen Stefani was an arsehole. What happened to you Gwen? You use to be cool.
7) Sufjan Stevans - Come On! Let's Boogie to the Elf Dance
How could a song with that title not feature?
8) Eels - Christmas Is Going To the Dogs
Becasuse in our house as dog is for Christmas (as it's the one time the Grandparents visit. Just to make clear they have a dog, they're not dogs themselves. But they are racists).
9) Joy Zipper - Christmas Song
Not particuarly festive sounding, but very cute.
10) British Sea Power - Victorian Ice
The most tenuosly linked song on this list, but ice is christmassy, isn't it? Also the Victorians are responsible for the modern version of Christmas, so there.
11) Sufjan Stevans - We Three Kings
It's that man again! One of my favourite carols arranged beatifully, when the recorders kick in it sends shivers up my spine. In a good way.